Today I have been mostly...

Sunday, December 24, 2006


This is who I really hate:
Those compelled to write
poems at this time of year,
or at some national plight.

They are published in the paper,
and are full of dodgy rhymes,
they have boring words, and mundane thoughts,
and most contain one or two much longer than the average lines.

A poem should open like a flower,
and words, wave softly in the wind,
with thorns to pierce the hardest hearts,
and thoughts to tame the wildest mind.

A poem’s life is infinite
Etched on the soul with rage,
and published in a dusty book
not a chip stained letters page.

Saturday, December 09, 2006


For an exciting evening of raw passion and sensual pleasure – look no further than a night in washing your hair! Yes – I have been reading the back of shampoo bottles again! I have given up in the rabbit-shampoo-smell-a-like, and decided that it is better to have nice smelling dandruff!

I’ve been using my new shampoo (as opposed to the previous sham-‘pooh’) since Wednesday, and have come to the conclusion that the woman in the advert for this particular product is quite possibly overacting. My reaction to it has been more along the lines of “Mmm, that smells quite pleasant.” Maybe I am just harder to please…

The stroke of amazingly good fortune I had earlier in the week was finding someone in the family who was about to buy some of the foul shampoo!! I happily donated mine and I couldn’t have been more delighted (although still not close to ecstatic reaction of the woman in the Herbal Essences ad.)

It is interesting, while waiting at the bus stop (something I seem to spend a lot of time doing) to look at the passing cars and see if the drivers ‘match’ their vehicles. While I was doing this today, I spotted a ‘friend’ (sort of) who has been driving for about the same time as I have – with the same 20-odd year break between passing the test and actually driving. I do hope that I don’t have the same expression on my face when I am driving – I have to say, how she looked is how I feel when I am driving – but I like to think I can hide it with an aura of nonchalance.

I am nervously awaiting my exam result. I can honestly say I have no idea what sort of mark I will get. I hope I did enough to pass, but I know I waffled and rambled a lot. If they were looking for clear, concise answers, then they would have been somewhat disappointed with some of the gibberish I wrote. Although panic did set in during the exam, it in no way affected my ability to waffle and ramble for England. In a waffling & rambling exam I’d get 100%.

Although I was disappointed with last year’s 58%, what counts more than anything is getting 40% - how pissed off would I be with 39% - let's hope I never find out. I would be happy with 40% because it means not having to re-take the exam, I'd be devastated with less than 17% (which would mean re-taking the whole course again - which I don't think I would want to do). Obviously anything more than 40% and I will be auditioning for shampoo adverts!

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